Genesis 14:11-12 – So the enemy took all the possessions of Sodom and Gomorrah, and all their provisions, and went their way. They also took Lot, the son of Abram’s brother, who was dwelling in Sodom, and his possessions, and went their way.
In the previous few chapters of Genesis as we’ve followed Abraham’s story thus far, we see him called by God to leave his own country, but he takes with him his close relative, Lot, when he’s actually called to leave his entire extended family behind. As the story unfolds, he probably wishes he had done exactly as the Lord asked and not brought Lot along for the journey.
As Abraham and Lot both amassed wealth and possessions, Lot seemingly riding the coattails of Abraham’s blessing, they decide to split ways and Abraham takes the land that will become the Promised Land while Lot heads south, both literally and figuratively, to a nearby city called Sodom, which is not known for its piety. In fact, in Genesis 13:13, it says of Sodom that they were “wicked, great sinners against the Lord”. Not the best place to settle your family.
It seems that Lot makes a lot of really poor choices for he and his family and, because of those poor choices, he suffers a lot of consequences, including being taken as a prisoner of war when the city is overtaken, losing his wife because he was a passive husband and didn’t lead his wife and family well, and, as we’ll see later, passing out drunk as an homage to Noah at which point his daughters sleep with him to try and get pregnant.
Through all of this, the curious thing is, he’s called “righteous” in 2 Peter 2:7. How could someone who piggybacks on someone else’s blessing and moves his family to one of the most wicked and evil places on planet earth be called righteous? In the multiple times Abraham builds an altar to worship the Lord, he’s never mentioned as joining him or building his own altar. He’s even given the opportunity to grab his family and flee the sinful city of Sodom and, because of his passivity, still puts his family in danger.
It also bears the question why Abraham continued putting up with Lot’s drama. It turns out that Lot’s dad, Haran, died unexpectedly so some wonder if Abraham, not yet having his promised son, saw himself as a father figure wanting to help Lot. But, for our own lives, it brings forth the question of how we should handle relationships like this.
With some friends and family members, we love them and want so badly to be able to help them but, at some point, we have a decision to make between three choices. We can either have a healthy relationship with them, which is the ultimate goal, but many people make impossible; we can have an unhealthy relationship, which they prefer but brings harm to us; or we can have no relationship, which is often healthier for us but painful for all. If there’s a relationship in your life that is dragging you down rather than building you up, I would encourage you to inspect it through this lens so you and your family can be the healthiest and live the life and path that God has called you to.
Are there relationships in your life that are unhealthy that you need to either try to make healthy or create boundaries towards to protect yourself and your family?
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