Jesus’ Secret to Prayer – Ashley Chase

Co-author of Pray Like Jesus, Ashley Chase shares how we can identify father wounds in our own lives and how we can receive healing from them.

Pray Like Jesus book summary: 

Pastor Mark and Ashley Driscoll are proud to present a new book concept “Pray Like Jesus”. The big idea behind Pray Like Jesus is that Jesus favorite title for God was Father, and He taught us to pray, “Our Father”. Therefore, once we understand the Father heart of God prayer is easy and natural. Writing this book as a father and daughter will help reinforce the big idea that prayer is talking to your Dad. 

 Identifying the father wound: 

8 kinds of dads 

  • The Missing in Action Man. This kind of man died or was so sick that he was unable to function in a normal healthy way. His absence was not a personal rejection but created a personal loss. 
  • The Deadbeat Dad. This man has walked out on your life and does little to nothing to help you, love you, or bless you because he does not much care to know you. 
  • The Addicted Dad. This man self-medicates with behaviors like drugs, alcohol, sex, porn, gambling, and so on., leaving little room for anyone or anything else. 
  • The Mr. Nice Guy. This man is genuinely tender and kindhearted. He’s not big on conflict or correction, which means he gets walked on a lot and has a hard time winning at work or defending his family from harm. 
  • The Selfish Dad. This man devotes his free time to his hobbies. His time and money go to himself and his out-of-order priorities. 
  • The Party Hearty Pop. This man is the nice guy who most everyone likes, but hardly anyone respects. You cannot count on him since he’s immature and refuses to grow up and consistently take on adult responsibilities. 
  • The Domineering Dad. This guy is overbearing, intimidating, and wins through bullying.  
  • The Good Dad. This guy is not perfect, but he is present. He does care and tries to be a burden lifter instead of a burden giver for his family. When he’s wrong, he apologizes as he knows he is not perfect but wants to learn and grow to be a better dad. 

These can explain biological fathers, spiritual fathers, or father figures and can lead to a father wound.  

To heal the father wound, we need to forgive the father on earth who hurt us and start spending time with our Father in heaven who can heal us. 

  • Colossians 3:13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someoneForgive as the Lord forgave you.” 
  • Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one anotherforgiving each otherjust as in Christ God forgave you.” 

Forgiveness allows us not to blame someone else or condemn ourselves but to be freed to live the life that God has intended for us.  

Personal study questions 

  1. What is your relationship with your physical and spiritual fathers like? How could that have contributed to father wounds? 
  2. How would you explain your prayer life in the past and present? 
  3. What changes would you like to make in your prayer life in the future? 

Prayer points 

  1. How has your earthly father wronged you? How can you forgive him? 
  2. What wrong views of God result from father wounds in your life? How can you ask God to change your heart and mind? 

Jesus’ Secret to Prayer 

Real Women  

Excited to do first book with dad 

Whole concept as father 

Opens up some issues 

 

8 kinds of dads 

Mine not perfect but good 

Lots of good memories 

But seasons 

Layers to pain 

 

Myself expectations 

Friends expectations 

Marriage expectations 

 

Needed to forgive myself 

Extend grace to others 

Forgive my dad   

To heal the father wound, we need to forgive the father on earth who hurt us and start spending time with our Father in heaven who can heal us. 

  • Colossians 3:13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someoneForgive as the Lord forgave you.” 
  • Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one anotherforgiving each otherjust as in Christ God forgave you.” 

Mother wound reflection of father 

Important to deal with for legacy 

Transfer from blame to forgiveness  

Forgiveness allows us not to blame someone else or condemn ourselves but to be freed to live the life that God has intended for us.  

Photo of author

Mark Driscoll

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