Song of Solomon #4 – His Garden

In this sermon from the Song of Solomon series, Pastor Mark and Grace Driscoll are in verses 3:6-5:1, the wedding day and honeymoon. Conveying the Biblical significance of the marriage covenant, going into depth on what makes and breaks the marriage.



Song of Solomon 3:6-5:1

Wedding Day & Honeymoon Night

  • 2nd most important day & decision of life
  • Ancient Near East weddings – last up to 1 week, consummated 1st night
  • Wedding Photos


3:6-11 Who is this coming up from the wilderness like a column of smoke, perfumed with myrrh and incense made from all the spices of the merchant? Look! It is Solomon’s carriage, escorted by sixty warriors, the noblest of Israel,  all of them wearing the sword, all experienced in battle, each with his sword at his side, prepared for the terrors of the night. King Solomon made for himself the carriage; he made it of wood from Lebanon. 10 Its posts he made of silver, its base of gold. Its seat was upholstered with purple, its interior inlaid with love. Daughters of Jerusalem, come out, and look, you daughters of Zion. Look on King Solomon wearing a crown, the crown with which his mother crowned him on the day of his wedding, the day his heart rejoiced.


4:1-15 How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes behind your veil are doves. Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from the hills of Gilead. Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn, coming up from the washing. Each has its twin; not one of them is alone. Your lips are like a scarlet ribbon; your mouth is lovely. Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of a pomegranate. Your neck is like the tower of David, built with courses of stone; on it hang a thousand shields, all of them shields of warriors. Your breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies. 6 Until the day breaks and the shadows flee, I will go to the mountain of myrrh and to the hill of incense. You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you. Come with me from Lebanon, my bride, come with me from Lebanon. Descend from the crest of Amana, from the top of Senir, the summit of Hermon, from the lions’ dens and the mountain haunts of leopards. You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. How delightful is your love, my sister, my bride!  How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume more than any spice!  Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride; milk and honey are under your tongue. The fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon. You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain. Your plants are an orchard of pomegranates with choice fruits, with henna and nard, nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon, with every kind of incense tree, with myrrh and aloes and all the finest spices. You are a garden fountain, a well of flowing water streaming down from Lebanon.


16 Awake, north wind, and come, south wind! Blow on my garden, that its fragrance may spread everywhere. Let my beloved come into his garden and taste its choice fruits.


5:1 I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride; I have gathered my myrrh with my spice. I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey; I have drunk my wine and my milk.


Eat, friends, and drink; drink your fill of love.

How are men & women different?

  1. She is verbal
  2. He is isual (25% women Shaunti Feldhahn)

What is a marriage? = 1 man & 1 woman in a covenant that is consummated

1.    Covenant – wedding

  • 2nd most important day of life
  • Ancient Near East weddings – last up to 1 week, consummated 1st night
  • 60 warriors = protection (cell phone, dependable car, secure home, insurance)
  • Royal wedding national holiday

2.    Consummation – honeymoon

  • Private garden vs public park

“The woman speaks here, inviting her beloved to come and share sexual intimacy with her.” John D. Barry et al., Faithlife Study Bible

“she now invites him to come into the garden of her life in the fullest possible way. It may be locked to others but it is certainly not locked to him. The phrase ‘I could eat you’ is not such a modern expression. Here she invites him to do that very thing.” John A. Balchin, “The Song of Songs,” in New Bible Commentary: 21st Century Edition. 

What builds a marriage?

  1. Compliments are deposits, criticisms are withdrawals

She – expressed insecurity appearance

He – compliments long dark hair, teeth, lips, cheeks, long neck, and breasts

·         2 baby fawns

·         “there is no flaw in you” = standard of beauty

  1. Counsel – “Friends” approve (who is your wise counsel?)

·        Not family, leaking or venting, not alliance building

What breaks a marriage?

What went wrong? 700 wives 300 concubines

  • Solomon – birthed out of sexual sin/adultery/murder
  • Wisest man after Jesus Christ
  • Some marriages political

1 Kings 11 – 700 wives, 300 concubines, demon gods, turned his heart from God

  • Solomon = richer than Gates, smarter than Einstein, more powerful US Pres., more spiritually influential than Pope, bigger harem Hefner

#1. The last day of marriage is more important than the first day of marriage

#2. Lust and porn accrues a harem larger than Solomon’s (heart in Matt. 5)

#3. The longer you wait to repent the more damage is done to God & your spouse.

  • Song Songs, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes
  • XN’s vs non-Christians divorce stats w & w/o filters

#4. Blessing & cursing continue for generations

#5. If you walk away from God you are capable of the worst evils, even the murder of children.

  • Ashtoreth – Canaanite goddess of sex (poles)
  • Milcom – Ammonite chief god
  • Chemosh – Moabite god w/child sacrifice
  • Molech – children sacrificed by fire

Bradford Wilcox & Other Sociologists

  1. Highest divorce rate – couple practicing different religions
  2. Born again XN couples – lowest domestic violence lowest divorce rate, highest marital satisfaction, most frequent sex
  3. Also make best parents & families

Discussion Question:

In a private conversation with your phones off looking at one another, with a lot of love and grace, have a healthy conversation where you take time to complement one another in any area that you can (e.g. spiritual growth, physical attraction, emotional connection, sexual pleasure, physical beauty, acts of service, generosity, sense of humor, etc.).

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Mark Driscoll

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