“So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.” – Romans 14:12
When I was 45, I resigned from my job in obedience to God, and our family moved to Arizona in faith. I felt God was calling us into a new season, and I didn’t know what was going to happen. We had kids in elementary school, middle school, high school, and college, and a tree fell on our house, which housed all our possessions and held our money in the form of equity, right after we moved. A giant tree literally sheared our master bedroom off the house, splitting our bed down the middle on a Saturday morning. If we had been home, my wife and I would be dead. It was a crisis situation.
Recently, Grace and I were going for a walk, and I said, “Honey, during that time when I had no job, were you stressed?” She said, “No, why? It’s your responsibility.” I’m a Bible teacher, I taught her that, and it put a lot of pressure on me. She said, “It’s your job to feed this family, not mine. So, I don’t worry about it; that’s your job.” I really was very grateful and appreciative, and I thanked her. I asked her, “Did you ever think, ‘Hey, I should go get a job?’” She said, “No, I have five kids; you need to work and figure it out. That’s your job; I don’t worry about it.” It’s not a sin for a woman to work or generate income, but if she has a lazy husband who isn’t willing to work, they have a role reversal where she treats him like one of the kids and takes care of the family, leaving him at home with a chore chart and to drink beer out of a sippy cup.
I like to say that young men are like trucks, and they drive straighter with a load. I’ve said this for decades. If you’ve driven a two-wheel drive rig in the snow or rain, the rear wheels are all over the road. It’s hard to keep it straight. Young men are like trucks; they have a lot of energy, but unless you load them up with responsibility, they’re going to end up in the ditch. Young men need more responsibility, not less. Men drive straighter with a load.
A guy with a family to feed and a hard job to work does not have time to waste trying to determine what his gender is from 1-2 PM on Tuesdays. That same guy does not have time to sit around all day worrying about his emotional health because his kid needs braces, and his wife needs a dishwasher. He has to grind it out at work, which makes him happy because he feels like a man for carrying the weight of responsibility for his family. Research concludes,
A very large body of research demonstrates that when men are engaged in helping rear their biological children, they are more likely to behave in prosocial ways. They are less likely to commit crimes, less likely to be violent, less likely to drink alcohol or consume drugs. Fatherhood seems to channel male energy and aggression toward constructive and prosocial ends. Indeed, across cultures, becoming a father has been observed to lead men to become less selfish and more socially responsible[.]…Becoming a father can generate a powerful motivation for a man to provide for his children and behave in prosocial ways. (1)
Men who work hard and make sacrifices to provide for their families are heroes and legends, and they should get an entire month dedicated to honoring them instead of our current stupid Pride month.
We will finish the week discussing the presence of men in the church in tomorrow’s devotional.
Where do you need to take more responsibility in your own life?
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