Proverbs 22:6 – Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
One of the most helpful things a parent can do in raising a child is help them to discover the will of God for themselves. Scripture, listening prayer, seeking wise counsel, and doing research are ways that believers discover the will of God. Practically, it is important for a parent to not always tell growing children what to do but instead to encourage them to seek God’s will for themselves. Once the child has made a decision, they should share it with their parents who can help them discern if their decision was wise or unwise.
Our children each learned to hear from the Lord at a young age and started sharing with us how they believed God was leading them. There were times that they erred but not in major ways. There were times that what we would have told them to do would have been wrong. As our kids got older, I would often tell them, “I will support whatever decision you make, so long as it is not ungodly.”
Our differentiating and eventually adult children do not need to be controlled by us; they need to be supported by us. We do not need to agree with their decision to support it, and our hope is that, by honoring their growing walk with God guided by a personal relationship with the Holy Spirit, they will invite us in as wise counsel along with other mentors.
Jesus Christ matured as He aged. At each age, He was mature for that age. Explaining this trend, Luke 2:40 says, “…the child grew and became strong, filled with wisdom. And the favor of God was upon him.” Luke 2:52 further says, “Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man.” God can work in children’s lives no matter what age they are.
Spiritual maturity and physical maturity do not occur the same way. Physical maturity happens quite naturally in most children. Spiritual maturity, however, is a different matter. Human beings do not automatically become godlier and more mature by simply getting older. Instead, maturity requires walking with God, working together to grow in grace and godliness.
Sometimes, parents simply hope that a child outgrows immaturity, but this is usually not the case. A child with serious immaturity can carry that with them into adulthood unless it is addressed and dealt with by the parent. Foolishness doesn’t turn into wisdom without God’s intervention.
Our goal as parents should be to help our child spiritually mature as they age. Paul says it this way in 1 Corinthians 13:11, “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.”
At each age, we need to honestly consider if our expectations for our child are too high or too low. We need to consider what maturity looks like for our child at each age of their life. Then, we can evaluate their maturity and help them grow in maturity as they age.
How can you practically mature through any stages or seasons that you didn’t previously mature through in the appropriate time?
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