Divorce Thoughts from Dad

Malachi 2:15-17: “Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. ‘For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.’ You have wearied the Lord with your words. But you say, ‘How have we wearied him?’ By saying, ‘Everyone who does evil is good in the sight of the Lord, and he delights in them.’ Or by asking, ‘Where is the God of justice?’”

God is a Father and His people are a family. Because He cares about His kids and grandkids in every generation, our Father has a lot to say about marriage and divorce. At the end of the Old Testament, we find the little book of Malachi which gives final instructions to the family of God. His instructions are insightful for single people, married couples, children of divorced families and divorcees.

For single people, the reality is that at some point you will most likely marry. Statistically, nine out of 10 people marry at some point in their life. Who you marry is the second most important decision you will ever make following who you will worship as your God. Who you marry in large part determines what your life will be like, what kind of home your children will grow up in, and what generations of your legacy will experience long after you are gone.

For married couples, the key to marriage is for both the husband and wife to have a healthy, loving, and growing relationship with the Lord. If that happens, God will give love, forgiveness, patience and more to each spouse to share with each other as gifts from the Lord. Long before a couple falls out of love, they fall out of the pattern of apologizing and forgiving when they are wronged. When this pattern is practiced, the marriage endures because the issues they face are never considered as important as the relationship they share. When issues are more important than the relationship, eventually an issue ruins the relationship. But, when the relationship is more important than the issues, issues are overcome for the sake of the relationship.

For children of divorced families, in Malachi we find the Father heart of God comforting and helping those who have endured what you have endured. The key is not to blame God for decisions that were contrary to God. Instead, we must have faith in God, forgive our folks, and find lessons we can learn to help us heal up and have healthier relationships in our future than our folks had in our past.

For those who are divorced, the verse in Malachi 2:16 is sometimes translated, “I hate divorce, says the Lord” (NASB). What this does not say is that God hates the divorcee, because He does not. But, God does hate the pain that divorce causes everyone involved, just like those involved hate the complex grief that it brings. Lastly, God will not divorce you. The God of the Bible will never give up on seeking a loving relationship with you, no matter what you do, or what is done by others to you. His is the one relationship that you can always count on.

Are you confident in God’s love and commitment to a relationship with you?

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