How to Spice Up Your Marriage (a Valentine’s Day ❤️ Special)

Do you want to spice up your marriage this Valentine's Day (and beyond)? Join us for an unforgettable night that will help you keep the flame lit. 🔥




Real Romance Pro Tip #1: Faith

Message friends 40th wedding anniversary – Faith, Forgiveness, Friendship, Fun 

For your marriage & ours to get to 40 years! 

Married? Hold Hands 

Satan is the Father of Lies. The truth sets you free. 

1.    The lie discourages non-XN from coming to the church for marriage/family  

2.    The lie discourages XN from faithfully practicing biblical faith in marriage/family 

W. Bradford Wilcox – Sociologist UV, Dir Nat’s Marriage Proj; Fellow Inst Fam Studies

  • Profess vs Practice. 

Being a church member like gym member = useless unless show up & work out

  • Beliefs – 1. Bible God’s Word 2. people sinners 3. Jesus as Savior
  • Behavior – 1. Church attendance 2. Bible reading 3. Prayer

Summary Facts 

  1. Lowest rate divorce – Born Again XN practice faith together & agree big issues 
  2. Highest divorce rates – different religions 

Bradford Wilcox Soft Patriarchs, New Men 

“…conservative Protestant family men are more likely…to do positive emotion work in their marriages and are more consistently engaged emotionally in their marriages…”

“…wives…are more likely…to report happiness with the love and affection they receive from their husbands.” 

“…active conservative Protestant husbands are the group…least likely to commit domestic violence…” 

“Family men who are integrated into the life of a religious institution-especially conservative Protestant men-spend more time socializing with their wives…” 

“…conservative Protestant married men with children are consistently the most active and expressive fathers and the most emotionally engaged husbands…” 

“Active conservative Protestant family men consistently have the highest levels of practical and emotional engagement in fatherhood and marriage…” 

“Men who are regular churchgoers are more likely to spend time in youth-related activities, they hug and praise their children more often…and they yell at their children less than other fathers…” 

The Truth 

1.    God created marriage & family 

2.    The Bible is the greatest marriage book ever written

3.    A couple that obeys the Bible has God’s anointing & is guaranteed marital success

God is Pro-Marriage

Mark 10:6-9 [Jesus said] “from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’  ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Have Faith in Marriage and Family

“Conclusion: Our prior result stands: premarital cohabitation consistently predicts higher rates of marital dissolution in the U.S. Research into marital dissolution should be made more robust, transparent, and replicable.”

·         In 1960’s cohab before marriage 5%. Today, more than 70% cohab before marriage 

·         Cobitation is practice for divorce, NOT marriage

“…the typical marriage of a woman with a religious upbringing is about 10% less likely to end in divorce within the first 15 years of marriage than the typical marriage of a woman with a non-religious upbringing…religion fosters relationship stability by pushing young adults away from cohabitation, which is highly unstable, and towards marriage, which is much more stable…religion seems to impact relationships mostly by changing the kind of union a woman enters in young adulthood…The upshot of all this is that the religious model of marriage and family appears to boost the odds that young adults can marry before 30 without increasing their risk of landing in divorce court.

  • People waiting longer – 30+
  • Religious people younger – mid 20’s & less cohabitation

= high rates of success, low rates divorce 

“What study after study has found is that a good marriage and family are the greatest boosters of happiness – far more than a pay raise. And it’s not even close.”

Faith in God Changes Your Marriage and Family

Being lonely has been found to have the same public health effect as smoking 15 cigarettes per day. In our survey, just 22 percent of church goers are considered

lonely, which is a much lower level of loneliness than the general population.

=Church is great for your relational/emotional health

“…religious people, on average, have better mental health than non-religious people…we find that the negative association between Covid-19 and mental health is much smaller for religious people. We find that the worsening of mental health associated with Covid-19 was around 60% higher for non-religious individuals compared to individuals with similar characteristics having average levels of religiosity. We find that the benefits of religiosity are mainly attributable to religious attendance… Hence, while there are benefits of shutting down religious establishments during a pandemic to prevent the spread of a contagious disease, there are also costs to the mental health of attendees that should be taken into account in any cost-benefit calculations for such policies… a decline in religiosity had a significant effect on deaths due to suicides, poisonings, and alcoholic liver disease…[we] conclude that religiosity may increase mental health through the provision of social support networks, counseling sessions, and regular prayer groups. Church great ur mental health 

Church is the best place to find a spouse 

  1. We started wrong & would be divorced & devastated w/o God, Bible, Church
  2. We would have had constant division if God & the Bible were not over us 
  3. Our home was not perfect, but it was filled with Scripture, prayer, worship, & fun 
  4. Worshipping & serving w/your spouse & family is the secret to health 
  5. It’s never too late to bring God into the center of your marriage & family 


Photo of author

Mark Driscoll

It's all about Jesus! Read More